The Red Thread

The Red Thread

A Introspective Collection of Life Observations



    Posts : 13
    Join date : 2009-11-28
    Location : My perch on the moon

    Cancer Empty Cancer

    Post by joeygregor on Mon Aug 16, 2010 10:41 pm

    I need to write this post. I need to get it off of my chest and move on. I am not sure if I will send it on.....or if I will hit delete but, here goes: I have cancer. Melanoma to be exact. In the past year, I have had ten biopsies and six surgeries. I just had three more biopsies and they are going to be doing surgery on two of them. One, they are not totally sure on so they are taking it anyway.

    Now, if my doctor keeps catching them all, this is all just an annoyance. Just a little sliced skin. But, I must rely on that to happen. My doctor, Margo, is an angel in my mind. Her thoroughness and total caring is the reason that this was first found and is now kept in check. She is a doctor that understands and cares. I watched a movie recently called 'The Doctor'. It was an older, William Hurt movie about a doctor who learns compassion when he gets cancer himself. She seems to truly understand in that same light.

    One thing that has bugged me is that up until now, all of the spots have been under the clothing. One of my new ones is on my knee which sees the sunlight a few months of the year. If you look up the reasons for Melanoma, you usually see it's cause is from the sun.

    Mine, I believe, might be from something different. And, if so, answers many other health issue in my life over the years. I have been directed to a website on Blue Water Navy. The ships that sat out in the ocean off of the coast of Vietnam. A study by the Australian navy showed 56% more Melanoma cases in their cases than any soldier with boots on the ground.

    If this is true and the cause is from chemicals used in country and washed out to sea then distilled in our drinking water on board ship, then other issues in my life have also become much clearer.

    Shortly after getting out of the Navy, I began getting anxiety attacks. I remember well how it all started. I was starting my first job outside the Navy. The first day, I ended up in sick bay ( I was working for the Navy as a civilian worker). I just felt sick. Then later, when I moved away from San Diego, the morning that I left, I became very ill. I actually threw up in the shower that morning. On the way up the coast to Oregon, I ended up in the hospital one night with flu like symptoms.

    Over the years, these attacks have made my life hell at times. On a trip to Hawaii on my fiftieth birthday, I ended up in the Hospital once more. The diagnosis was depression. I knew what it was but was helpless to do anything about it. It was actually the thing that brought me into the VA system when I began to see a VA doctor about the problem. I had an attack so bad one time that the medicine that helped me out did not work for me and now the system says that I am allergic to that medicine and they will no longer give it to me. The problem there was the that particular medicine was more proactive. One that I could use the night before and the one I have now is reactive and can only be taken once the episode starts. It works well if I can work through the initial problem but recently when I planned to go to Alaska with my wife and daughter, it became so intense that I had to return from Seattle while they went on.

    Now, you tack on a sleep disorder and a blood sugar problem and these seem all have possible roots in the same place.

    I have been so blessed over the years. I own my own business, I am my own boss, I have many friends and family who truly love and look up to me, I am not rich but I want for nothing.....I am the poster child of success in many peoples eyes. And with all of that in front of me, I sometimes struggle to be happy.

    I don't want pity, I only ask for understanding.

    Rich Mullins was a man who understood me and many others like me when he wrote these words:

    Sometimes my life just don't make sense at all
    When the mountains look so big
    And my faith just seems so small
    So, Hold me Jesus
    Cause I'm shaking like a leaf
    You have been King of my glory
    Won't you be my Prince of Peace

    Posts : 87
    Join date : 2009-07-07
    Age : 63
    Location : 3 seconds to the Moon

    Cancer Empty Re: Cancer

    Post by Pegasus on Sun Feb 22, 2015 3:33 pm

    It has been a long time since I posted here but thanks so much for sharing your situation with us. If you have the time it would be great to hear about how things have turned out. Hope all is well! Smile

    "I have a simple philosophy. Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. And scratch where it itches." ~Alice Roosevelt Longworth

      Current date/time is Mon Apr 06, 2020 3:37 am